DEAR ABBY: Our family is having its first reunion since my mother and father have been gone. We three brothers are now the oldest generation.
Related Articles
Advice |
Dear Abby: My husband was disinherited and nobody acknowledges the injustice
Advice |
Dear Abby: On Christmas Eve, I just snapped. What is wrong with me?
Advice |
Dear Abby: Why would they complain about money and then buy Oreos?
Advice |
Dear Abby: My gut tells me his marriage isn’t that good, and I want him back
Advice |
Dear Abby: Was I wrong to send this group text about their child?
My older brothers are planning the event. They are inviting my ex-wife (though none of my three nephews’ exes). This is upsetting to me and my wife of 20 years.
I feel strongly that when you marry, you marry into the family, and when you divorce, you divorce out of the family.
My ex-wife and two sisters-in-law have remained close friends since our divorce and have shunned my present wife.
Should we be upset about the invitation? Should we not attend if my ex comes? One brother says she is still “part of the family” and should be included. My wife and I are furious.
Who is right here?
— PARTY POOPER IN IOWA
DEAR PARTY POOPER: Did your parents include your former wife at previous family reunions? If they did, I can understand why she would be welcomed at this one. However, if they did not, I can understand your feelings, in light of the fact that your siblings’ wives have shunned your wife of 20 years.
That said, not all divorces are the same. Some former couples manage an amicable severance, and you cannot and should not dictate who your relatives choose to maintain relationships with.
If you and your wife would feel more comfortable skipping the reunion, I wouldn’t blame you.
DEAR ABBY: My sister recently lost her husband, who passed away after a brief fight with cancer.
Her daughter, my niece, was scheduled to be married later this year. They struggle with finances, and my brother-in-law’s death exacerbated the situation.
In order to help out, my wife and I quietly gave them $1,000 to put toward my niece’s shower so they could have it at a nice place. My sister was appreciative, but we unfortunately heard nothing from my niece.
Fast-forward a couple months, and the wedding is now called off.
My sister and her daughter recently went on a cruise and have told me they have booked another. There has been no mention about returning our $1,000.
My wife is becoming increasingly frustrated and …read more
Source:: The Mercury News – Entertainment
