Dear Eric: I have recently noticed a disturbing trend during road trips with my wife of more than 30 years.
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As we visit our college-age children at their campus, we regularly face car rides of three hours or more. I willingly drive, and that’s my wife’s preference as well, although she would take a shift without issue.
After a short time, she will retreat to her phone. I will try to continue a conversation, but I will get short answers and no attempt at real participation.
We have a great marriage, and communication is not an issue, nor is phone use a problem during other moments.
I get that she is trying to make a boring car ride go quickly; and I don’t need help staying awake, navigating or maintaining concentration on the road. I will inevitably put on a podcast or music and life goes on. However, I find myself annoyed and think the behavior is slightly rude.
I feel there is an unwritten rule that if you ride “shotgun,” your role is to engage with the driver. Am I off base here?
– Lonely Driver
Dear Driver: Ah, shotgun. The vice president of the car. A hallowed position, ruling over the music, the navigation, but never the air-conditioning.
As with any other vice presidency, the role of shotgun is what you make it. Personally, I appreciate occasional navigation help but prefer to choose the music myself.
If you want your wife’s engagement, ask for it. That said, if you’re just as happy putting on a podcast, let the unwritten rules go and consider these college car trips down time with low stakes. A Camp David for shotguns, if you will.
Dear Eric: My daughter is having her fourth child. She wants to name him after her brother who died of suicide three years ago.
I’m not sure I’m ready for that but everyone says let her commemorate her brother.
I don’t know how I’ll feel holding this …read more
Source:: The Mercury News – Entertainment
