‘Nothing could have prepared me for how difficult and how relentless parenting is.’ (Picture: Nicola Jackson Photography)
Welcome back to How I Parent, where we take a look at how the nation raises its kids.
This week we speak to mum-of-two and content creator Lyndsay Gardner, 38, who lives in Brighton with her wife V, 46, and their two children, Violet, seven, and Pearl, five.
After a bumpy ride to parenthood, Lyndsay rearranged her working life so she could be present for the girls, whenever she could be.
The couple hope to bring their children up with an open-minded view of the world and Lyndsay believes that above all, kindness is the most important quality to instill in her daughters.
Lyndsay says: ‘I met V in 2013 at work. We got together in December 2013 and two months later we went travelling, hiking around Peru.
‘Travelling brought us together and we had conversations quite early on about our intentions.
(L-R) Violet, V, Lyndsay and Pearl (Picture: Nicola Jackson Photography)
‘We both realised having children was something we wanted to do – but as two women it’s not such an easy conversation – it was more of a strategy meeting.
‘It meant the road was a lot longer, so we started talking about having a baby 18 months into our relationship, which was quite early, but I didn’t fall pregnant for another 18 months.
‘We did a couple of rounds of Intra Uterine Insemination (IUI) and that didn’t work. I couldn’t stand the heartbreak again, and all the expense for a little shot of joy, so we moved onto a round of IVF which worked first time.’
Violet was born in February 2017, weighing 6lbs 2oz. She was followed 17 months later by Pearl, weighing 6lbs 9oz, born during Brighton Pride in August 2018 and delivered by a midwife also in a same-sex relationship.
Lyndsay says: ‘It sounds like we are making it up, but it’s true.’
The couple shared the same values, and when it came to raising her children, Lyndsay was determined to be present for her children.
She says, ‘We had a lot of time to talk about parenting. We have always been on the same page when it came to values but nothing could have prepared me for how difficult and how relentless parenting is.
Lyndsay says they lived in the non-judgmental bubble of Brighton (Picture: Nicola Jackson Photography)
‘During maternity leave with Pearl, I worked on growing my own business so I could be at home all the time and could work around the children.
‘It’s very different from how I was raised, my mum and dad worked a lot and I was often with a childminder. That was the norm when I was growing up and it’s why I wanted to make a change.
‘I wanted to be there with the girls, even if it meant juggling my work and working at 1am in the morning, so I could be there for every sports day or school trip.
‘As a result, I would say we …read more
Source:: Metro
