Culture

Dear Abby: Only after we married did I learn who he really is


DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have been married for nine years. While we were dating, he was kind, considerate and loving. After we married, he turned into a chronic complainer, something he later confessed he had been hiding while we dated.

He talks to me like I’m trash and then gets nice when he wants something. He complains about my grown children, my best friend and even if I leave for work a couple of minutes early. He is a miserable person.

I cannot do anything to make him happy. I can’t take this anymore. He has taken the things away from me that I love — flowers, gardening, pets, books, friends, etc. I’m ready to leave, but he has cancer and I’d feel guilty. He is clear right now, but it will come back.

I don’t want to stay. Life is too short to live this way. He has a great support system with his family. They would take care of him.

My health has been affected by him and his terrible attitude. What do I do?

WORN-OUT WIFE

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DEAR WIFE: What you do now is consult a lawyer, pack your bags and leave before he worsens.

Do not expect your husband to be grateful for any of the efforts you have made on his behalf during the course of your marriage. During the time you were dating, he hid from you the fact that he was a verbal abuser. Now you know he was a fraud. Don’t feel guilty for protecting yourself and reclaiming your life.

DEAR ABBY: My brother passed away. He and my sister-in-law had a good marriage.

A month after his funeral, my sister-in-law gave her kids their father’s clothes, instructed them to go through them, keep what they wanted or sell or donate the rest. It has been barely a year. Now she’s redecorating their house — painting, taking down pictures and buying new furniture.

This bothers me greatly. I’m so hurt that everything is being changed. It’s like she’s trying to erase him — all within one year! Should I ask her why everything is being changed and disposed of so soon? And should I feel so hurt about this?

UNSURE HOW TO FEEL

DEAR UNSURE: Your former sister-in-law appears to be more …read more

Source:: The Mercury News – Entertainment

      

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